You're the same as the rest of them, you know. You hear 'Amber' and you figure we've just got it made, hey, what could be better than being an Amberite? But you're wrong. You see the legends, and you don't see the people. Try trading places with me, look at it from my point of view...


How would you like to grow up with a family where everyone had to have their special niche, everyone had to be best at something...


Take Benedict. Trying to win a damn game off him, heh, there's a waste of time. And Caine, oh, nobody's sneakier than Caine sure, but did you ever wonder where he practised and honed those skills? Brothers and sisters make such good targets. Then there's Julian, self-proclaimed Lord of Arden. Ever wonder what drove him into the forest in the first place? Stop wondering, he finally found something Benedict couldn't beat him at, and never gave it up. Gerard always seems so concerned and fair, you think he started out that way? How'd you like a brother as strong as Gerard, who thinks you should settle all your disputes arm-wrestling, but you can never beat him? It loses amusement fast. Yeah, he's sweet, but everyone thought he wasn't too bright. Gotta wonder, he never picks fights he can't win, more than you can say about the rest of em. Ah, you're thinking, what about Random? Yeah, well, he might've gotten picked on, but he was still the baby, and somebody always watched out for him. Eric and Corwin always had this "aren't we dashing" rivalry going, not to mention, nobody could ever keep up with them once they got moving, or fighting. They're always fighting. And of course Bleys, perfect, narcissistic, dashing, chivalric, self-important Bleys, who always looks great (just ask him) and is ever so nauseating. And then finally Brand. Well every family has a tempermental artist, they just don't usually take it to such extremes. I think he went all mystic from Benedict and Gerard giving him such an inferiority complex, but don't tell him i said so...


And my sisters, no I didn't forget them, after all, who could? They were as bad as the boys, Fiona was the smartest, Flora the prettiest, and Llewella has her own little world, and even there she gets to be mysterious and special in her own way. So where'd that leave me? Not with the girls, who didn't approve of a warrior sister, and not with the boys, who had this idea about their sisters being delicate and not 'in the running' as they put it. Nope, no candidates for the throne there. A girl? In charge? How silly. Left me just a tomboy, stuck in the middle with no neat niche or specialty, and not a single one of them ever understood me.



No, not even Corwin. Oh he tried, and he was sweet enough as brother's go, but he always had these overly romantic Romeo and Juliet ideas, and all this angst and woe over father keeping us apart. Really, the drama was just too much, not to mention he never did listen when I tried to gently dissuade him. He just couldn't believe I didn't actually consider him the great tragic love of my life. If he'd just listened instead of constantly looking over his shoulder to make sure Eric wasn't catching up, he might have grown up a little.








But overall, none of them ever really knew me. And not a single one ever went to MY shadow, though I've been to most of their personal little worlds. Then again, the only one who might appreciate it is Random. At least, he'd like the air currents and the music. Just once, I'd like to meet someone who doesn't know who or what I am, show them around my little corner of reality, and maybe they'd understand what my family never did...